Social Media Gravity Well
No blog post today. All of my social media energy has been drawn into a conversation on Facebook about respecting people’s gender identity.
600+ shares and several hundred comments later, I’m still dealing with comment management and a little bit of bigot herding.
Seems like an awful lot of argument over a post that basically comes down to, “Hey, if folks could treat other people with respect and common courtesy, that would be great.”
D. D. Webb
August 26, 2015 @ 5:31 pm
Do blogs count as social media? This is my favorite blog, but I personally avoid most of what gets described as “social media” like the rabid devil himself. It just seems like it’s exhausting even when it’s not simply awful.
Jim C. Hines
August 26, 2015 @ 5:35 pm
I think so? (And thank you!)
I kind of lump most of my internets stuff into the social media bucket, but I don’t know if that’s truly taxonomically correct.
Gus Hinrich
August 26, 2015 @ 5:45 pm
Yah, I noticed the post when you put it up. Approved, didn’t think too much about it because duh, it’s obvious.
The next morning I logged on & thought “Wow, this one blew up!! Why?” Then I started reading comments. Amazing.
Jonathan Olfert
August 26, 2015 @ 5:58 pm
My wife and I loved the post. It hit home for us — we’ve been discussing that exact thing, and a lot of related issues, thanks to some religious and social turmoil in the area. So thanks for that.
Matthew Thyer
August 26, 2015 @ 9:39 pm
That thing is still going? Wow! All that frothing malice over pronoun usage. It’s kindness, simple kindness, that those few trolls can’t seem to summon. Sorry dude, I’m glad you continue to stand up for the right thing although I’m a little concerned that you’re becoming a meat shield.
Erica Wagner
August 27, 2015 @ 12:32 am
Wow, Jim. I saw your post earlier and liked it, but when I came back, the feed had exploded. Mostly nice folks, but a few gender police and deliberate idiots among them. You’ve got the patience of a saint.
Jim C. Hines
August 27, 2015 @ 7:43 am
Honestly, it hasn’t been *too* bad. I’ve blocked maybe a half-dozen people total out of several hundred comments. Mostly it just means I have to make sure I’m watching everything that comes in, just in case.
Jim C. Hines
August 27, 2015 @ 7:43 am
Most of the comments and commenters have been great. But it only takes a few to sour things. I don’t get it…
SherryH
August 27, 2015 @ 8:26 am
@D. D. Webb–the lady who set up our Geek Breakfast group and teaches a series of Social Media Marketing classes for the local Small Business Center counts blogs as social media. So there’s a data point, I guess… 🙂
@Jim, I haven’t seen the post (because even though I have an account, FaceBook muddles the heck out of me and I can’t navigate it at all, though I could (and probably should) learn to…) but yeah. A little common courtesy and common sense would go a long way. I don’t think it’s asking too much, with respect to gender or lack thereof, to treat people as they wish to be treated.
Mari Kurisato
August 27, 2015 @ 10:13 am
Oh my god stop upsetting MY life by pretending you’re a male author named Jim C Hines instead of a quadra gendered blueberry muffin named Coconut already! I can’t do critical thinking! Just typing it hurts my self esteem and fear of change! Blaaaaargh! I won’t call you Jim until a Doctor says God made a mistake! Just accept your muffin-ness already!
Pam Adams
August 27, 2015 @ 11:03 am
Sigh.
lauowolf
August 27, 2015 @ 4:28 pm
wow
the comments are bottomless
bless you for your patience
Sally
August 27, 2015 @ 8:30 pm
Blogs aren’t social media because you get to shape the conversation and you own the space. Thus, fewer chuckleheads. We can’t all have a nifty Mallet, tho.
Sally
August 27, 2015 @ 8:32 pm
Facebook is Mos Eisley sans the cool stuff. Truly a wretched hive of scum and villainy.
I only go there to read “Bloom County 2015”. Dandelion break!
bookworm1398
August 28, 2015 @ 10:26 am
I read Miss Manners and she regularly gets letters from people stating XY wants to be called Ms. but she is really a Mrs. Or so and so insists on using my first name although I’ve told them not to. Etc., etc. – its amazing.
Thomas Hewlett
August 28, 2015 @ 2:45 pm
I’m doing my best to read, listen and educate myself on trans topics. But I confess I still have a lot to learn and a lot internalized bias/prejudice to deal with.
What I cannot understand is why that should be someone else’s problem??
If you have a preferred pronoun, I will use it. Your decision and my continuing education have NOTHING to do with each other. I don’t get why this is so hard for people. I see it on Facepalm – I mean, Facebook everyday: someone trying to argue someone else out of a choice they’ve made about their own life. Why would you even consider doing that? What exactly are you trying to do? Change their mind so that you feel comfy again? I don’t get it.
Alessandra Kelley
August 28, 2015 @ 3:40 pm
Not looking, nope nope nope.
Mind, it’s more that Facebook and I don’t get along well than that the thing would probably infuriate me.
bookworm1398 mentioned Miss Manners. I have always gone by her general principle that one calls a person whatever that person would like to be called. To do otherwise is so extraordinarily rude as to be considered, if not an act of war, at least a piece of deliberate disrespect.
One may choose to deliberately be rude to people. But then one should not try to justify it as somehow reasonable, heroic or noble to do so. It is an attack, and should be acknowledged as one.
David Langford
August 29, 2015 @ 5:50 am
One of the more jaw-dropping moments in recent controversy was seeing John C. Wright (clearly no fan of Miss Manners) refusing to include the Nielsen part of “Patrick Nielsen Hayden” because the inscrutable laws of God — or at least those of John C. Wright — forbid a man to take his wife’s name.
Jim C. Hines
August 29, 2015 @ 4:04 pm
Do you know how rude it is to out someone as a blueberry muffin? Especially when they’re still struggling with coconut-related issues! 😛
Mari Kurisato
August 30, 2015 @ 3:26 pm
laughing, and yet crying inside.